Mu-mon-kan

I don’t want to sleep.

OK…that’s not entirely true.  At 5 AM, I wish I could sleep, but my mind’s too active and, seemingly, uncontrollable: I think about shows, past/current relationships (intimate and platonic), work, mistakes, random scenarios (real and imagined), etc, etc, ad infinitum…

Maybe “life’s too complicated,” “I make life complicated,” or some other unoriginal thought.  I want the reality of an Iron & Wine song:

One more drink tonight as your gray stallion rests
Where he lays in the reins
For all of the speed and the strength he gave

One more kiss tonight from some tall stable girl
She’s like grace from the earth
When you’re all tuckered out and tame

One more tired thing the gray moon on the rise
When your want from the day
Makes you to curse in your sleep at night

One more gift to bring we may well find you laid
Like your steed in his reins
Tangled too tight and too long to fight

The warmth of Sam Bean’s voice and the beautiful simplicity of his lyrics entices me into an idyllic life of horses and stable girls.

Realistically, I need to be able to afford the stable, horses, and tall, female employees.  Besides, could I really leave the comfort, the connectivity, and the knowledge behind?  I don’t require much, though I think I need more.  Love, food, and horses might be all that’s needed.

…and sleep.

Whoever said that technology makes life easier is now on my short-list.  My last Blackberry sync did a great job getting all of my computer’s info . . . though I really wish it hadn’t done any “Spring Cleaning,” specifically in the form of wiping all of my friends’ birthdays from iCal.

:: sigh ::

If any of my friends are reading this, could you let me know when, exactly, your birthday is?  That’s so I can do what I normally do when that fateful day arrives . . . you know . . . not much.

I’m not talking about that root of all evil. Or that one. That one, either.

I’m talking about money.

Always the necessary evil–survival wouldn’t be the same without it–it compounds as you “succeed” in life. For instance, I just closed on a condo, to, finally, be unfettered by the shackles of a monthly rent payment. However, this newfound freedom(?) almost triples my previous monthly liability and, paradoxically, seen as a step in the right direction, by the majority of society. Do I really need it?

The justification of the purchase is deceptively easy since the condo existed prior to my purchase which follows my belief in leaving behind a small footprint on the earth when I die (the less environmental impact, the better.) Is this just the start of exceedingly easier and easier justifications? Will I be able to stop when I before I completely exceed my needs? Have I already?

I’m not looking for answers, I’m just talking to myself . . . online . . . in public.

Currently Rocking Out To: Broken Box – Queens of the Stone Age